'Brian' was arrested on suspicion of stabbing his partner in the neck.

Alan explains what an Independent Domestic Violence Advocate is and how he helped 'Brian' who had experienced domestic violence for three years.

 Click here  for the article and details of how to contact Alan.

 

"Fists and Chips"

a short radio drama by Keith Large starring Jeff Stewart and Carrie Hill

Click below to hear a short radio drama (11 minutes) that challenges stereotypes and highlights domestic violence against both men and women. It stars Jeff Stewart (PC Reg Hollis from The Bill) and Carrie Hill.  Our congratulations and thanks to Keith, Jeff and Carrie for this thought provoking drama.

Domestic violence against men

Domestic violence against men has been around for centuries but has largely been a hidden issue.  Call it domestic violence or call it domestic abuse - it isn't just women who are victims, there are abused men too.  Male victims of domestic violence are increasingly speaking out and looking for support but there are few support services for them, bias against them and little understanding of the issues they face.

The news section of this site has several examples of violent women and their male victims of domestic violence because these are dramatic stories that hit the news.  But emotional and psychological abuse are less obvious and don't make such good headlines unless they are cruel false allegations such as in The Daily Mail on 19 December 2011.

Abusive women are often able to use the bias of the Family Courts in favour of women to inflict emotional and financial abuse against men.  Mothers are often able to restrict contact and to alienate their children against their fathers.

UK Government statistics show that one in six men will be victims of domestic violence at some stage of their life. There are plenty of reasons to believe that the real numbers of men experiencing domestic violence are much higher. Why then are there so few resources available to male victims? Why is violence and abuse by women against their male partners minimised, excused and even blamed on men? This website sets out to answer these questions and to provide a resource for male victims and their friends and supporters.

Male victims of domestic abuse are the forgotten victims.

Domestic Violence as Bullying

Lets not beat about the bush.  In plain language domestic violence is bullying and both men and women can be bullies.  Bullying can be defined as a 'systematic abuse of power'.  Men tend to use more physical aggression and women tend to use more relational aggression.  Both can have a devastating effect on their victim.

DARVO

Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender

DAVRO is an acronym used by Dr Jennifer J. Freyd, PhD of the University of Oregon to describe the steps in victim blaming by offenders.  Women can be particulary adept at this and can often convincingly portray themselves as victims to the police and courts, sometimes using tears to help in the manipulation.

Read more about it on the Shrink4Men website

Why don't men report domestic violence?

Click here for the BBC One Show feature by Dominic Littlewood about domestic violence against men 

Visitors notice

DVmen.co.uk does not provide emergency help or support.  It provides information and resources to help better understand domestic violence by women and the experiences of male victims.

In an emergency you should dial 999 or contact your local Police Domestic Violence Officer.

If you need help or support for yourself or for a friend or relative consider contacting one of the helplines listed on this page.

New on website

Details of Men's refuge accommodation in Home Counties area - Click here

A second article from Alan of BESBWA explaining how the Courts can help you and the importance of evidence - Click here       

News

Melanie Sykes arrested and cautioned over assault on toyboy husband Jack Cockings

27/11/2013 16:12
Daily Mail 27-11-2013

'To be beaten by your wife is desperately humiliating'

15/09/2013 04:31
 Daily Mail 15-09-2013  Brain-damaged motorbike hero Eddie Kidd reveals abuse he suffered from his jailed wife  

Philip W. Cook writes on the shockingly high number of women who beat their partners—and why it's harder for the men to find help

22/07/2013 01:25
The Daily Beast 22-07-13

Elderly woman throws all her shopping at man in street argument

31/05/2013 13:36
Daily Mail 31-05-2013  An attack on an elderly man by an elderly woman, in what appears to be an incident of domestic abuse.  The Daily Mail headline initially read 'Elderly woman throws ALL her shopping at man in hilarious street argument caught on video', but subsequently the...

Nick Ross on his new book 'Crime' including views on domestic abuse

25/05/2013 06:59
Daily Mail 25-05-2013

Polish wife who killed husband by stamping repeatedly on his head, can't be deported under EU rules

06/04/2013 17:23
Daily Mail 06-04-2013

Children Witnessing Domestic Violence ‘Not Particularly Important’ By Itself

04/04/2013 16:55
Fathers and Families 04-04-2013 An interesting article on research into the effect of children witnessing domestic violence.

Blonde mother of two, 31, 'killed young lover, 20, by stabbing him 24 TIMES'

03/04/2013 15:05
Daily Mail 03-04-2013

800,000 Male Victims of Domestic Violence in 2012/12

07/02/2013 06:42
Family Law Week 07-02-2013 5% of men were estimated to have experienced domestic abuse in the last year, equivalent to an estimated 800,000 male victims 

"Working with violent women" by Erin Pizzey

04/02/2013 15:34
www.avoiceformen.com 04-02-2013 

Jealous girlfriend stabbed 21-year-old lover to death in front of his younger brother and sister in row over him contacting an ex

01/02/2013 23:14
Daily Mail 01-02-2013 
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