'Brian' was arrested on suspicion of stabbing his partner in the neck.

Alan explains what an Independent Domestic Violence Advocate is and how he helped 'Brian' who had experienced domestic violence for three years.

 Click here  for the article and details of how to contact Alan.

 

"Fists and Chips"

a short radio drama by Keith Large starring Jeff Stewart and Carrie Hill

Click below to hear a short radio drama (11 minutes) that challenges stereotypes and highlights domestic violence against both men and women. It stars Jeff Stewart (PC Reg Hollis from The Bill) and Carrie Hill.  Our congratulations and thanks to Keith, Jeff and Carrie for this thought provoking drama.

Domestic violence against men

Domestic violence against men has been around for centuries but has largely been a hidden issue.  Call it domestic violence or call it domestic abuse - it isn't just women who are victims, there are abused men too.  Male victims of domestic violence are increasingly speaking out and looking for support but there are few support services for them, bias against them and little understanding of the issues they face.

The news section of this site has several examples of violent women and their male victims of domestic violence because these are dramatic stories that hit the news.  But emotional and psychological abuse are less obvious and don't make such good headlines unless they are cruel false allegations such as in The Daily Mail on 19 December 2011.

Abusive women are often able to use the bias of the Family Courts in favour of women to inflict emotional and financial abuse against men.  Mothers are often able to restrict contact and to alienate their children against their fathers.

UK Government statistics show that one in six men will be victims of domestic violence at some stage of their life. There are plenty of reasons to believe that the real numbers of men experiencing domestic violence are much higher. Why then are there so few resources available to male victims? Why is violence and abuse by women against their male partners minimised, excused and even blamed on men? This website sets out to answer these questions and to provide a resource for male victims and their friends and supporters.

Male victims of domestic abuse are the forgotten victims.

Domestic Violence as Bullying

Lets not beat about the bush.  In plain language domestic violence is bullying and both men and women can be bullies.  Bullying can be defined as a 'systematic abuse of power'.  Men tend to use more physical aggression and women tend to use more relational aggression.  Both can have a devastating effect on their victim.

DARVO

Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender

DAVRO is an acronym used by Dr Jennifer J. Freyd, PhD of the University of Oregon to describe the steps in victim blaming by offenders.  Women can be particulary adept at this and can often convincingly portray themselves as victims to the police and courts, sometimes using tears to help in the manipulation.

Read more about it on the Shrink4Men website

Why don't men report domestic violence?

Click here for the BBC One Show feature by Dominic Littlewood about domestic violence against men 

Visitors notice

DVmen.co.uk does not provide emergency help or support.  It provides information and resources to help better understand domestic violence by women and the experiences of male victims.

In an emergency you should dial 999 or contact your local Police Domestic Violence Officer.

If you need help or support for yourself or for a friend or relative consider contacting one of the helplines listed on this page.

New on website

Details of Men's refuge accommodation in Home Counties area - Click here

A second article from Alan of BESBWA explaining how the Courts can help you and the importance of evidence - Click here       

News

Migrant domestic violence support scheme extended

31/03/2012 08:34
BBC News 31-03-2012 This news item quotes Jo Clarke, from refuge charity Eaves Women's Aid, as saying "The Sojourner Project pilot has been a huge success, enabling in excess of 1,000 people, 12 of them men, to escape abusive relationships and secure indefinite leave to remain in the...

The Enemy Within Report

26/03/2012 11:47
 The Enemy Within Report from 4Children  This report of 55 pages in length correctly identifies that about a third of domestic violence victims are men but then only manges a couple of sentences about them in the whole report.  It suggests that about 950,000 children are...

Domestic violence affects one million children in the UK

25/03/2012 10:19
The Independent 25-03-2012 Almost a million children in Britain are affected by domestic violence, either as victims or witnesses, a new study will reveal tomorrow.

Young victims of domestic abuse to be offered Relate counselling in North Yorkshire

12/03/2012 19:23
Children & Young People Now 12-03-2012 Lets hope that this counselling support is offered on a non-gendered basis.  Relate training has been said to approach domestic violence from the point of view that it is largely a male on female problem and there have been mixed reports about how...

The law doesn't give a damn about fathers

10/03/2012 20:19
Daily Mail 10-03-12  Louis de Bernieres explains eloquently the bias that fathers, including those who suffer domestic violence, face in the Family Courts

Violent couples may struggle as parents

07/03/2012 14:41
The British Psychological Society 07-03-2012

Latest on Clare's Law

02/03/2012 09:07
Telegraph 02-03-2012 This article reports that 'Clare's Law' is likely to be trialled but you have to read the whole article to understand that it could be used by men too.  A totally biased slant on the subject from the Telegraph but in all probability the implementation of this trial is...

Clare's Law

20/02/2012 19:20
Guardian 20-02-2012 About a third of all domestic violence victims (excluding sexual violence) are men but this article is written as if male victims don't exist.

MPs and peers demand law against stalking

07/02/2012 05:12
BBC News 07-02-2012 As with most domestic violence, men comprise about one third of victims.

The day my wife beat me up because she hated my haircut

25/01/2012 22:07
Daily Mail 25-01-2012

Ian McNicholl to have cosmetic surgery

24/01/2012 03:07
Daily Mail 24-02-2012
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